Piyo :D

What can I do to forget you?

2012-02-05T16:37:00.001+08:00

You know, I wish I could in a blink of an eye, forget you . Just like that .
Not remember anything about you, plus all the days I've spent thinking about you and looking at you.
I want to forget all those happy memories .
Cause they hurt the most .
Sometimes I feel that I'm not good enough.
Yet today I feel that maybe you're not my type .
I'm not clear of my thoughts and feelings . Really I ain't .
I feel really awkward when I'm near to you, and I'm not able to even talk.
You'll probably think I'm useless, unfriendly , quiet .
But truthfully, it's just that i can't talk well to guys.
Yeah, not even to my own relatives .
Sorry to anyone who is reading this.
Kind of feeling quite annoyed and unhappy right now :>
I just want to write down the words from my mind :/

UGHHHH.
I hate love .
I hate how foolish I've been.
I hate how shy I am.
I hate how inadequate I am compared to others .
I hate the fact that I keep hating .
But I can't stop.
Cause I have sin in me .
And sin is just plain evil.
Hatred, jealousy, gossips, lies.
Sigh.
Lord, I need Your help.
I need you to just stop me from doing things I'm not supposed to do :(

Who ever said life will be easy?

2012-01-28T22:58:00.001+08:00

You know what, life will never be smooth sailing .
Never .
God never promised us perfect lives . He only promised that He'll always be there for us .
I may not be able to see God, but I can feel His presence .
Everyday, every moment of my life .
I wish I had the bravery to tell others how they too will be able to feel this strong sense of security & love I get every single day .
Though there are many ups and downs , at least I know that no matter what, God is with me and that I can talk to Him 24/7 :)

---------
These few weeks have been quite stressful . Tests , homework, trainings , piano etc .
Scored quite well in my bio :)
-Thank God :D

Well, I think volleyball training is fun.
It's just whether you make the effort to train and improve the spots where your are weak in :)
No effort made -> no results .
I don't want to keep saying that we're gonna lose , I'm sorry.
But i don't see why we can't be serious at the right times .
Competition's coming soon. Early next year .
How are we going to do well when we can hardly receive the ball in the right position ?
I apologize for having negative thoughts .
Prove me wrong .
Tell me that whatever I've said is nonsense .
Show me how united our team is and that we're able to work together to achieve a common goal.

-----

Flag day today.
Went with Clara to novena ;)
And met with Danica and RY on the bus.
Collected loads of coins on that stretch of pavement :D
Saw Roy too at United.
Hahaha super cute <3 :D

Had a great day at novena and especially so at church ;)

Thank You Lord .
Really .
Without you I'm nothing .

What if trials of this life, are your mercies in disguise .

2012-01-20T22:12:00.001+08:00

This week has been a roller coaster ride . Many painful experiences and happy memories too .
Our prefectorial board had to come out with a CNY skit ( in 2 days) .
And somehow , s, v, z and I became in charge of the whole thing . Well, initiative . With power comes great responsibility .
We had to plan everything , practice , get manpower & just make sure everything went smoothly.
I thought that it would be easy, but it wasn't , trust me .
Now I know how leaders feel when people rebel against them . When people are unhappy and we have to do something to please them .
When teachers keep pressurizing and scolding them .
{ THANK GOD THE PERFORMANCE IS OVER!}
We cried , we let it out .
We worked together , us 4 .
In the end, we had fun & laughter.
Plus the embarrassment in front of the whole school.
;)
I'm just so glad it's over .
So sorry to those people who didn't get to be in the skit!
>:( next year okay?
--------

Studies are also really stressful.
Sec 3 life is already so chaotic , what will sec 4/ JC/ UNI be like?
Im struggling to cope with everything .
Maths, amaths, my sciences , even English :(
----------

Tomorrow will be a better day.

2012-01-14T16:23:00.001+08:00

Feeling so suckish now :'(

Skipped church just to go out with my friends .
What kind of a Christian am I?
Sigh .

I hate failed shopping trips . -.-
I hate myself .

Perplexity and confusion.

2012-01-08T18:17:00.001+08:00

I can't imagine how incredibly painful it'll be for anyone to see the person they love with someone else .
Neither can I imagine myself being with him.
So it works neither ways :(
Someday it'll be either I watch him journey through life with another girl, or be that girl who gets to spend life with him .

A crush for 3 years and still ongoing .
How difficult will it be to forget him?
I long to talk to him.
But it'll just be awkward .
Picture someone of the opposite gender that you've only seen around and not talked to before , coming towards you and suddenly going, ''Hi, my name is so and so...'
:b
You'll probably be more or less like, ' umm, k. I'm ... So and so um nice to meet you. '

I guess that's okay. But what comes after that? -silence -
:(

Fairy tales are meant to be fairy tales . They don't turn into reality.
Neither will a handsome, smart and rich guy with a good heart marry a girl who can hardly speak in proper sentences , overweight and have lots and lots of bad points .
Oh well.
Life still goes on.
Love isn't all there is to life . Though without love , there wouldnt be any meaning to life.

'For God so LOVED the world that He gave His only begotten son, that whosoever believes in Him shall not perish but have everlasting life' -John 3:16

God loved each and everyone one in this sinful world and he gave us the greatest gift of all <3
-----
Sigh.
Life is a tiring journey .
But God has His purposes for every disappointment, trial, obstacle you and i may face .
I can't do anything but wait to see what God has planned out perfectly for me .
Hopefully I'll stop thinking so much. I'm still young anyway.
-----

That is what makes you beautiful.

2012-01-06T21:39:00.001+08:00

Baby you light up my world like nobody else , the way that you flip your hair gets me overwhelmed :)
; What makes You beautiful- OneDirection.

So many people are in love with the band . Hahha but not me :)
I just happen to like that particular song & it's the lyrics are stuck in my head ;D
My brother got annoyed with me cause I kept repeating the same lines over an over again!

----
Lots of stress approaching :(
O levels , (ok, that's still a long way) , speech that I have to give to the sec 1s, prefect duties ( I'm the IC :/) , CNY skit , studies , volleyball competition , piano playing plus exams in the later part of the year .
AHHHHH.

God, help me in everything I do :)
That I may glorify Thee .

-----
It's going to be a busy month! ;)

.. And I thank You Lord ;)

2012-01-04T14:20:00.001+08:00

Today indeed has been a much better day ! Many more reasons to thank God for . Prayer does work . Truly, it does ;)

School wasn't that much of a torture today. I quite enjoyed the time spent there actually (:
Though most of the lessons were filled with teachers going on and on about their subject , I managed to stay awake & pay attention .

Ah well, hopefully my school life will continue to be a pleasant one . Filled with many pleasant & happy moments :D

Again,
THANK YOU LORD <3
I know You've been helping me lots through the day :)))))

School.

2012-01-03T21:22:00.001+08:00

Sigh, school has begun.
Another year of hardwork and stress.
Today was the first day of school, and I hated it the minute I stepped into the school's compound .
1. Almost tripped while walking to parade square .
2. Get insulted at the parade square .
3. No sense of belonging at all .
4. Missed my prefect meeting & now have no idea about my duties am the events taking place .
5. I should stop complaining though I'm hating it so much.
-.-
Ugh, I fail as a Christian .
I've failed to shine for God .
Feel so hopeless .
Lonely .
:(
I just feel like self studying at home for 2 years and just take O levels on the same dates as everyone else .
.....

Life's great but ...
I guess It has it's ups and downs

Time for an update! :)

2011-12-30T16:41:00.002+08:00

"Like an ocean breeze, blowing on your face . Like a summer sun, with it's warm embrace. Like a gentle rain, plays a symphony. That's what I want my praise to be ;) "

That was part of the song, " My Praise" . :D
The song is stuck in my head cause it's so catchy & meaningful and maybe one day i'll be able to play it on the piano ;)

My holiday has been quite fruitful .
DVBS, Youth Camp, Orientation , Volleyball trainings, Family outings, church outings , clique outings etc .
Yeah :) I've quite enjoyed the 2 months break .
It saddens me that i'll have to go back to school next week on tuesday.
I havent completed my homework though i've already printed all of them out .
I just dont feel like using my brain to think .
:(
I'm definitely going to suffer in school.
Sigh .

Anyway, HAPPY NEW YEAR (in advance)
2012.
Year of the Dragon .

:(

2011-12-11T21:20:00.001+08:00

I love you CN , and i don't know if I always will . But it really hurts to have to do this .
Maybe you not attending youth camp when you were supposed to was a sign God gave to me. I prayed for a year for you to come . Earnestly , diligently I did . But God's answer was either a NO or a WAIT.
So I'll just wait till im older and let God do the work .
It really hurts to have to avoid you . To have to try to stop thinking about you and going crazy about you w my friends .
Thanks for all those precious memories anyways .

:)

KNOWING YOU JESUS, KNOWING YOU. THERE IS NO GREATER THING . YOU'RE MY ALL, YOU'RE THE BEST, YOU'RE MY JOY MY RIGHTEOUSNESS, and I LOVE YOU LORD <3
Thank you Lord for showing me the way .

Define happiness :
Knowing the Lord and having a relationship with Him :)

The Last .

2011-12-04T08:00:00.001+08:00

HELLOHELLO :)
So as the title mentions, this shall be my first & last post of the week ( Sunday's the 1st day of the week) cause ill be going for camp! :D

IM SO EXCITEDDDD ! It's really fascinating how time flew by so fast without me realizing .
*zooooom* and it's already December .

Mixed feelings .
Sad cause the school days are coming back again and happy cause youth camp is here <3

Anyway, I learnt a lot in church yesterday :)
Its true . Without God, life really is meaningless . But with God, your life transforms & you'll find your purpose for living :)
For God so loved the WORLD that he gave His only begotten Son .

Hmmmm, GOD LOVES YOU.
You might have been doing really good deeds or been the totally opposite by doing wrong . But God still loves you ya ? :)

So I really wanna thank God for everything & my leaders plus batch and group mates <3 hhehhe.

-------
OKBYE :) I NEED TO GOOOOO!
Ciao till next week!

2011-11-30T19:45:00.001+08:00

I'm not missing school AT ALL :D
Cause I'm not prepared for another year of focusing in class and wrecking my head cause of the workload .
HOLIDAYS ARE LOADED WITH AWESOMENESS :))

I wonder why people want holidays to come quickly , yet when they're here, they'd rather be back at school.

Wrinkly toes & smelly feet .

2011-11-29T20:19:00.001+08:00

Okay, maybe DVBS this year didn't turn out to be what I expected it to be . Maybe it's cause we've all grown up and now find things that we used to deem as fun , boring .

Well, actually it depends on the kids .
My group this year consisted of p1 &2 kids and not forgetting to mention, very restless ones :(
Okay, I shouldn't be complaining .

For God loves a cheerful giver & since I volunteered , I should just glorify Thee through my actions .
BUT MAN, IT'S SO DIFFICULT . Especially to control my temper when they are really annoying , do the wrong things , hit & scold the leaders or just keep talking non stop.
They're kids, I understand , but still ...

Or maybe it's the fact that my mind is boggled up with so many things that I can hardly concentrate on camp and the kids themselves .
I'm thinking of youth camp, of CN, sleeping , DVBS ending . Yeah, and a lot of other things .
I SHOULD NOT CARE ABOUT BOYS RIGHT NOW AT MY AGE UGHHH.

----
Anyway, the DVBS outing today was a failure . Rain .
Plus the fact that the field was muddy, hence the kids were unwilling to play all the games .
Sigh .

---
Went to Vivo after that & shopped around before eating dinner .
Heheh, bought gorilla's Christmas present . Which is really nice (y)
and also some gummies for camp !
Awesomeeeeeeeeeeee .

I shan't go into the details, cause I'm really exhausted and I'm dying to have a nice warm bath before sleeping :)
Tomorrow is going to be a very very very very long day .
GOODNIGHT ;)

The little things in life that makes you happy:)

2011-11-27T18:20:00.001+08:00

So as the title mentions about how little things in life can make you happy , I'm therefore really happy cause of those little things :D

Hahahah, firstly, I saw JN after such a super duper long time <3 I miss that guy. Hope he comes back to YP someday . All those memories of playing catching , blind mice , Etc with him, my bro and c are still etched in my mind . :( I miss my childhood days . Cause as we grew up, we've separated and gone our own ways .
No longer sharing those innocent thoughts or times of play .

---
Haha just hope he returns :)
And sx, mel, and a lot of other people who have disappeared from YP .
Second little thing that made me happy , CN's presence .
I don't care ( okay, maybe I do , but not THAT much) if he doesn't notice me or talk to me . As long as I see him, thats sufficient for me <3
I might be crazy over him.
I might love him.
But if it isn't God's plan to be with him, so be it . In His time, He will do what He will do :)

3rd little thing that made me happy:
My piano skills have improved :)
And I'm hoping to be able to play for SS and YP someday!
Maybe next year, cause AJ said that I'll have to try or else I'll never succeed .
:)

4th: I had a really good dinner (y)
5th: DVBS IS TOMORROW. IM NERVOUS BUT EXCITED! ^^

Okay Byeeeee :)

Time will pass us by .

2011-11-27T07:48:00.001+08:00

It's been such a long time since my family spent some time together :(
But at least we went out to eat and play yesterday (tho without someoneeee. Who was still sleeping -.-)
<3 table soccer / fuse ball? (idk)
Hahaha, my parents won my bro and I in both the game . What a pity :b
We were screaming and laughing throughout ;)

Then lunch @ some restaurant .
Which took really really long to serve our food .
But it was overall a good dining experience . 7/10

YP :D
Second advent of Christ .
Sometimes I really don't know whether to be scared or happy for the rapture .
Learnt a lot that day.

Monopoly deal & volleyball :)
I've still no idea how to play MD. It's so confusing :(
Playing volleyball was fun :D
Tho' I was disappointed that we didn't get to play captain's ball. Miss it soooooo much !

--------
IM UP EARLY TODAY( again)
And I will be for the next 3 days too .
Hohoho, DVBS :)

星期六,<3

2011-11-26T09:16:00.001+08:00

早安你好：）Hahaha I remember when I was young , I didn't know Sunday was 星期天。I thought it was 星期七, and everyone laughed at me cause I wrote it that way.
Oh well, I never liked Chinese .

----
I had a nightmare about my parents leaving me behind at home and I screamed out 'WHY?' , and woke up .

Lack of sleep .
Lack of sleep.
I need to sleep .
But I can't sleep.
This feeling really sucks.
Sleep . Sleep. Sleep. Sleeeeeeeep :(

Okbye.

Coincidences , nah. God's plan? YEAH .

2011-11-25T22:57:00.001+08:00

(God's plan, not coincidences )
Don't know why my title is messed up, TSK blogger :/
Hahahha, love the title .

Saw quite a number of people today while I was out (:
Jingchung, I forgot what their names are , Belva , winda & that donkey Jianing with her 'boyfriend'.
I also saw Glenson and cass @ city link the other day :)
Tirzah also saw her relief teacher & her classmate ! :)

It's kinda cool cause I was hoping to see my classmates during the holidays and i just received jn's reply this morning about piano stuff (:

Didn't expect to see her there!
HAHAHA *winkwink*
Your little secret of ahem is safe with me :D
OH BUT I STILL THINK CN IS MORE HANDSOME THAN THAT GUY'S BROTHER :)
因为他是我眼中的苹果.
He's the apple of my eye - directly translated . LOL.
Okay, dont get me wrong . I'm not thattttt crazy about him.

-----
Anyway, HAD FUN TODAY !
I CANT WAIT FOR YP & CAPTAINS BALL TMR <3

We were the reason.

2011-11-25T22:48:00.001+08:00

{ WE WERE THE REASON THAT HE GAVE HIS LIFE. Jesus loves me this I know :) } - Man , how cool is that? He died because He loved me .

OHOH, ( Living He loved me, Dying He saved me , buried he carried my sins far away, rising he justified, freely forever, one day he's coming, OH GLORIOUS DAY) ...
I'm in love with that song <3

-----
Anyway, what led to the title was the fact that I heard the song playing while I was in 'Precious Moments' :D
They've pretty cool stuffs there .
-----
Woke up real early in the morning (again)
I'm sure that my sleeping hours ate really messed up and screwed during the holidays . Sleepy :'(
Met Tirzah & went to Clementi mall to shop! ( IT'S SO FAR AWAY)
And in the end, we didnt find anything nice. What a waste .

Tirzah wasted a whole bowl of banmian. TSK. She ate only a few strands before announcing that she was full ~.~
MINCED MEAT NOODLES IS NICE (y) bar chor mee ( or whatever it's called)

Trained to DG, then went to PS :)
Caught a movie there. TINTIN :)
It's funny how they have repetitive names . TIN TIN , Thomson and Thomson . Hahahha :)
2 kids were sitting behind me and they laugh really really loud :D they also kept asking funny questions about the movie to their dad .
I'll rate the movie a 7.5/10 .
The fighting part was a little boring as it got too draggy. But the rest of the movie was exciting ^^

Movie ended .
We walked around and ended up in daiso. Bought those plastic wraps to place cookies in (y)
We're planning to bake cookies for Christmas! CANT WAIT . Baking is WHOOOOO~~ :DD

Walked around more, visiting all the other shops that looked appealing , then homed.

TEEHEE ;)
I feel so unhealthy now . I stuffed myself out of impulse with toffees , 5 whole pieces :'( UGHHH. Plus some sweets and a piece of chocolate .
Okay, EXERCISE TMR :)))

2011-11-23T23:31:00.001+08:00

God is too wise to be mistaken.
God is too good to be unkind .
So when you don't understand,
When you don't see His plan,
When you can't trace His hand,
TRUST HIS HEART <3

He alone is faithful and true. He land knows what is best for you .

Thank you Lord .
For everything .
Really, everything . :)

Today.

2011-11-23T19:48:00.001+08:00

SMILE :)

I'm never going to drink coffee in the late afternoon ever again.
I managed to sleep only at 3am yesterday and woke up really early in the morning .
I'm worn out and just exhausted .
----
My stamina has deproved :(
Went jogging with HM , but ended up jogging a little , walking a lot and talking too:)
Borrowed books from the library & then shopped a little at AMK .

DVBS IS NEXT WEEK.
A whole blast of excitement but a tinge of anxiety and nerves :(
Hope I'll lead well and also mix well with the rest.
:))))

The way I am.

2011-11-23T13:09:00.001+08:00

I know that I'm uniquely made , crafted by God's loving hands .
But I just can't help but wish I had pretty blue eyes, a sharp nose , straight teeth , white complexion and just a HAWT ACCENT:)
I don't want to be someone who speaks singlish .
So I'm bucking up :D
Books after books . I am going to read my way to proper grammatical structures and more profound vocabulary :D

Its the time of the month again.

2011-11-21T23:02:00.001+08:00

No, not my period . Not yet...
But moodswings, or PMS (pre-menstral syndrome)
The emotions I felt today : HAPPY :)
ANNOYED & ANGRY :(
SAD. EMOTIONALLY TIRED.
I also felt hatred. Towards myself ,
Why? I don't know. Maybe I think that I'm not pretty, not smart enough , not sociable enough. Just sucky in everyway.
On the other hand, I know that no matter what I'm like , God loves me <3
I love talking to God , sharing all u problems and woes with Him . It really makes me feel better <3

---
Walked around bugis with Beth today . Cause she texted me in the morning to say that she needed someone to accompany her ;)
And since I was free... Yeah :)
We were supposed to watch tintin, but we missed the show time :(
So we went shopping instead!
Quite a fail one. But overall, I'm contented and its awesome that she's happy :)

---
SHOPPING AGAIN TOMORROW <3
AND ON FRIDAY <3
Hehe, shopping week. Hope to get really nice clothes and maybe gifts for Christmas.

HMM LEAVE TAGS ABOUT WHAT YOUR WANT FOR CHRISTMAS! :)
No guarantees :p

Rewind Time.

2011-11-20T23:59:00.001+08:00

I wouldn't know whether to forward to the future or rewind back to the past if I had a time machine.
But that doesn't really matter, cause time machines probably will never be invented . So all I can do is live my current life now to the fullest .

Something probed my thoughts today . XP & Javier were talking how stupid it is to fall in love at such a young age , for people to have steads and things of such.
But I can't help it that I like CN.
Apparently , I JUST CAN'T STOP ;(
Ugh, and it's really annoying me .
Cause I don't know if all this will just be a fairy tale , fictional .
:( I'm not good enough for him.

I keep having mixed feelings and thoughts .
One part of me keeps thinking that God is in control of everything and that it's possible for him and me to at least become good friends. But another part of me keeps telling me to give up cause its just impossible .

I really don't know which part of me to trust.
-----
Anyway, went to church in the morning . Felt really happy <3
That indescribable feeling of getting to see that special person after 2 long weeks . I don't need to talk to him as of yet, just seeing him makes me really really really happy already.
(take careeee :) since you're overseas? According to that donkey JN :p)

OKAY, ENOUGH OF HIM. HAHA.

---
Ate lunch w Gloria and her mummy at AMK :) then went to watch the last -0 mins of puss in boots. Which really sucked :/ oh well, it's a show meant for kids anyway.

Bused down to serangoon gardens ,and then walked down to K's house , in the rain. Since we alighted at the wrong bus stop :(((
Played wii at her home, sang HM her birthday song then came home :)

OKBYE. IMY <3

Childish.

2011-11-14T19:04:00.003+08:00

Lol, Derrick.

You think I want to be in the same class as you meh?

-.- what have I ever done to even offend you?

Seriously .

I don't understand why people must say vulgarities in such a casual manner.

It doesn't make you cool , understand that please .

ANNOYED.

I can't wait for DVBS .

Distance makes the heart grow fonder.

2011-11-13T19:28:00.002+08:00

Man, I really miss you :(

I miss your really cute smiles and just having to see you .

I have a feeling that you're overseas, I don't know.

But well, come back soon and safely please?

Ughhh.

I hate it when I start missing you.

Because it means that I'm loving you more and more .

But whats the point? You're handsome, smart & rich.

Compared to me, you're too good to be true already.

:((((((

Oh well, GOD WILL MAKE A WAY FOR ME .

He knows my future ^^

; I love you rrrrrrrr.

11.11.11 :)

2011-11-11T16:26:00.002+08:00

I did not make any wishes at 11:11.
Why? Cause i dont believe that wishes will be fulfilled.
I believe in prayer. Prayers will be answered <3

Anyway, i spent my time @ training today.
Boring as we didn't get to play a match with RVH.
Oh well.
The class outing is also giving me a little headache.
No idea where we should go .
Dont even know if i should be in charge or not . I know i should take responsibility, but seriously? 2E3 doesn't even bother about a class outing. Sigh :(

Met with joshua on the bus and walked back together .
I kind of miss going to his house to play with him, his sister and my brother .
So many memories of my childhood still etched in my head .

:) HAPPY BIRTHDAY CLARA.
God bless you :)))))

2011-11-07T22:54:00.002+08:00

I'm so worried for my parents :(

Yet there's nothing I can do .

Id rather do all the work than see them suffer .

But they are just damn plain stubborn! -.-

Sigh.

[[you can always talk to God above, tell him that you need a friend to love, pray in Jesus name believing that, God answers pray . Have you told Him all your cares and woes, every tiny little fear He knows .]]

Lord , thank You :)

I push people away .

2011-11-04T16:45:00.002+08:00

Sometimes i feel so alone and isolated from everyone else .
Others are just busy doing things together and i'm left out .
Maybe i'm thinking too much .
Or maybe it's the fact that i push people away .
I dont want to get too close to people , cause i know i'll get hurt some way or another .
I'm not craving attention .
I dont want people to flock to me like im some superstar.
I just want them to care, to be aware that i'm there and to make me feel like i'm part of something .
When life gives you lemons, make them into lemonade.
I wish I could and i'm trying .

I sometimes also do wonder if i'm really irritating and annoying and annoying.
Cause nobody seems to want to talk to me .
I really dont want to give a damn, but i cant .

That's why, i really think that i think too much at times .
Maybe it's my appearance.
Or my personality.
Or the fact that i have a low self esteem.
I'll just have to build that up then .
Goodbye .

2011-10-19T21:58:00.001+08:00

i really hate myself, i really do .

I can't live without friends .

2011-09-12T19:33:00.002+08:00

Monday.

First day of school after the september holidays .

I kind of enjoyed the holidays . Cause i got to shop, watch my dramas, study at my own pace and sleep till whatever time i would have wished to .

But oh well, I shall face reality. School has begun .

Chinese and science was pretty much ordinary. Didn't exactly feel very bored .

So i paid attention and did took down notes :)

Geog was plain stupid .

We got punished for talking . :(

Stood for the whole lesson .

Maths was just really really boring .

I wanted to fall asleep .

ughhh.

Went to mosburger w carrie, xp, cheryl, eunice & ym.

CHEESEBURGER & MILK TEA <3

It's actually filling :D

Sat there and talked for around an hour , just to pass time :)

----

Volleyball.

Last training till the end of the exams .

Normal stuff. Digging, spiking, service etc.

Boring.

HTHT ( sort of) outside :D

homeddddddddd.

It's not easy, to be me .

2011-09-11T21:35:00.002+08:00

Five for fighting - superman , it's not easy <3 :)

----

Sometimes, I wonder why i chose Peirce.

I wonder why I didn't study hard enough.

I wonder why I was so stupid then .

Now i regret.

I wish I could've gone to a school that was less budget .

A school with a good reputation .

A school which name, when people asks what school you are from, actually rings a bell in their head.

A school with better teachers .

A school where guys were more mature.

----

I want to go to RJC , HWI or AJC .

I dont care.

I'm gonna study real hard for my exams .

I will .

Yikming .

2011-08-28T15:01:00.002+08:00

Hey deariee, HAPPY (belated ) BIRTHDAY \m/ :D

I hope you liked the cake , cookies and the card !

101% of love , effort and smiles put in .

Just for you :D

Had a great day out with you yesterday!

SENTOSA <3

Hope you enjoyed yourself too !

Uh , so yeah.

Keep smiling and kindly grow more mature :)
TEEHEEE.

love yaaaa :D

Life's journey is an experience no one will forget .

2011-08-28T14:50:00.003+08:00

What does it mean to have Faith?

-To have complete trust and confidence in something , someone .

Well, i have faith in God .

I entrust my life to Him <3

Cause I know He does what is best for me .

I love you God :D <3

---------------

Today might have been one of the happiest days in my life .

I dont know how to describe the emotions i'm feeling inside .

Happy? Sad?

Happy cause i finally got the chance to meet someone .

Sad cause i know i'll never get to have him .

Oh well ,

I'm still young.

Long way to go :)

GOD WILL MAKE A WAY FOR ME <3

----------

The battle aint over .

2011-08-24T20:09:00.002+08:00

To HM, CC and Naru .
Babes, cheer up !
Concentrate on the present, and on the future.
Don't look back at the past.
Especially when all it brings is unhappy memories.
And, study hard !
One failure aint gonna bring you down all the way.
Pull yourself up!
Work harder, STRIVE FOR EXCELLENCE :)
You can do it, i have faith in you !

-----

School as usual.
Shan't elaborate on lessons.

Stayed back for IPW :)
It was well, alright . Had fun going around collecting stamps . Making them chop on the paper for us though we didn't answer anything . Failure . HAHA.
We also got to eat the different types of food at our booth :D
NOMNOM, YUMMY :D

I love the tapioca <3
SUPER NICE.

----
Stayed back for interclass relay.
Just to watch them run, and kinda of like cheer for them :B
2E3 got first ! :D i almost thought they were 4th or smth, cause they were behind.
But in the end, we won.
CONGRATULATIONS :D to the runners.
Good job people (y)

HEHE, i love 2e3 <3
i can't bear to change classes next year.
Its like tearing all of us apart :(((

sigh .

Losing isn't everything .

2011-08-23T19:37:00.003+08:00

True, true .
People tend to change . Nobody stays the same.
Either change to become better or to become worst .
I hope I'll change to become a better person.
One who cares for her friends, who doesn't uses profanities and one who tolerant towards others.
I want to be loved and I want to love people.
No more hatred.

------

Star was horrible .
Cause i didn't prepare for the talk at all . So what came out my mouth was mostly utter rubbish.
I probably attained pretty low marks .
Marks for CA2.
Science - Bio -13/20
Physics - 12/20

English - 21/30
Overall - 69.7

Literature - 27/35
Overall - A2/A1 - i forgot :(

I really have to study harder for the E.O.Y examinations.
I really HAVE TO do well .
STRIVE FOR EXCELLENCE MAN :)
I will !
JIAYOU.

-----
Interclass.
I feel that 2e3 is more united now <3 somehow .
Hated that we had to play against 2e4 first.
Strong opponents cause of netballers .
Anyway, whatever .
We had fun and we did our best yeah?
Had fun :D

I'm super exhausted right now .
Muscles aching :B

Boring day .

2011-08-22T22:08:00.002+08:00

School yet again .
Was pretty excited to go to school, cause the weekends were really boring too.
Staying home all day @_@

Anyway, bused there .
Got back geog and chinese results.
Did, well. Alright :) Thank God i did'nt fail .
28/40 for chinese and 22/30 for geog .
MUST JIAYOU :)

Did a worksheet for maths , discussed some stuff during science , then the end .
DT test. ( :/)

Sports chanbarah.
Sucked.
Hated it a lot .
Waste of my time ~.~

I dont want to change into someone I am not .

2011-08-22T21:58:00.002+08:00

Struggles .
Difficulties .
Troubles .
Irritation , restlessness . Sadness, tears .

Life is full of all that .
But all of us have a choice .
Either to break down , or to cheer and pick ourselves up. And smile :)

---------------

Sometimes its hard to do the right thing.
Chinese compre : " Dont let the world change you, be the change ."
Change to world to become a better place to live in.
A better society .

I dont want to become someone I am not .
I dont want to become someone who will laugh at others.
I'm not perfect.
And not even close to it .
What rights do i have to tease, laugh and critisise others?
Seriously. I'm pissed with myself :'(

But sometimes it's just so difficult to control what i want to say .
Influences. All around me.
The school . So much for learning huh .

I remember you , dear friend .

2011-08-20T19:44:00.002+08:00

It's so easy to miss someone .

All the memories made, makes you reminiscent about the past .

I miss a lot of people . Most who have came into my life, but somehow disappeared .

I miss playing captain's ball at church . And playing blind monkey .
I miss talking over the phone for hours . Laughing, joking .
I miss playing basketball , running, sweating, and sometimes rolling on the floor laughing .
I miss my friends .
I miss my dog </3
He's someone who will just make my day, every single day .
Rolling around the couch . Licking , barking, just being awesome the way he is.
I miss feeding him with his favourite dog food that we could only afford to give once a week .
:(

I miss my urge to study , and actually do it.
I miss baking .

That's why i'm gonna bake on friday <3
I CAN'T WAIT .

I miss APS .
I miss Australia .
I miss going out with my family.

I MISS SO MANY THINGS, PEOPLE, PLACES .
</3

Resilience .

2011-08-19T22:07:00.003+08:00

So, the picture says it all . Never give up .

Talks from teachers regarding Volleyball today .

Found them pretty true and stuff .

I just hope that after these talks , our volleyballers will have a better mindset .

And that we can play together as a team, and train well :)

Really hope we can actually achieve something for ourselves .

Just 3 lessons today + common dismissal.

So school was pretty short :)

Ms Tan said i scored quite high for the geography test !

Really hope i topped the class / level ! :D

I'll never give up in my studies .

I want to have a good future <3

MUST JIAYOU !

------

No matter what , my dear friend .

Whether you choose to ignore me , avoid me or not .

I will always be here for you :D

God will make a way. Even when there seems to be no way .

He works in ways we cannot see.

He will make a way for me <3

He will be my guide .

Life's about learning .

2011-08-17T13:12:00.004+08:00

Learning from your mistakes.
Picking yourself up when you fall .
Doing better the next time .
Sure .

----
I can't believe i screwed up so badly for my piano exam.
I practiced so hard for it .
And yet, when the big day arrives, I just HAD TO get nervous.
And my hands just had to start sweating and not co-operating with whatever i want it to do .
Damn .
I feel so demoralized now .
I'm just hoping that i'll be able to pass.
Or all that hard work will just go down the drain . So will my mum's money.

PATHETICME.
=.=

-----
Mathematics is not my cup of tea.
And music is not my cup of coffee.
And i had to have both on the same day .

The maths paper was alright.
I knew how to do everything .
But i'm not sure whether i'll get them right or not.
Well, hopefully i'll get a high A1 :)

#ihatesetnotation.

Geog paper tomorrow.
Never knew .
Till now.
So i have to go and study .
BYE :)

CME topic : Are you a caring friend?

2011-08-16T22:31:00.002+08:00

Truthfully, i dont think I am .

I gossip about people even when i try extremely hard to.

I laugh when people do stupid things.

I make fun of my friends when i have nothing better to do.

I treat them like shit . And when they do such shit to me, i whack them.

Okay, so, practically, i suck as a friend .

But yes, i do care about my friends <3

When they're down, heart-brokened, sad ,

I do my best to cheer them up.

Cause whatever it may be, One must SMILE, and just trust God .

I wish my friends would trust in Him.

Though it seems so impossible .

i love my friends <3

They're the ones who allowed me to pull through the endless days and hours of school.

They're the ones who make me laugh .

They're the ones who talk to me , go out with me and teach me things.

They're the ones who care.

Thanks to Cheryl, XinPing, HanMin, Eunice, Yikming.

And to my church friends <3

WHO AM I - we did an awesome handmime. Super cool can?

HAHA, we should do it again sometime soon!

Loveeee ,

Bye :)

Topic : Life, again .

2011-08-15T22:26:00.002+08:00

So , as we all know, life continues . It goes on, it doesnt stop .

Despite the wishes and wants for life to rewind, it wont .

Until a time machine is invented .

Life sometimes hurt real bad.

People stab you in the back .

Love stabs you in the heart .

And ouch , the pain really burns your insides.

I wish i never fell in love .

Then i wouldn't have attained so much hurt .

But he made me smile .

Made me laugh . Turned my bad days to instant sunshines.

But mostly, turned my sunny days into cloudy , gloomy , stormy days .

So, yeah, i probably shouldn't have felled into love .

----------

Next , school.

Things as per normal . But I really cant stand when people dont know how to get serious and how to be playful at the right time .

Dear yikming , Please.

I know the hurt inside is deep, but don't do this to us.

It will just make me find you really irritating.

So stop . Okay?

27/35 for lit test.

1st in class <3

I'm dying of happiness inside, HAHA.

Hoping to top the E.O.Y lit exam too! Must JIAYOU :)

Piano exam coming right up soon!

Chinese exam tomorrow.

Havent studied yet.

Oh well :)

People .

2011-08-12T20:39:00.002+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ACE AND WENLIN :D
Aceeee , my childhood friend .
Now, gone . As in our friendship.
Oh well, come back to church soon alrights? :)

Wenlinnnn , STREETLIGHTS * ding*
thats my favourite and best memory i have with you.
We should create more memories tgt? HAHA.

HAVE A GREAT BIRTHDAY PEOPLE! <3

Just let me say, how much I love You :)

2011-08-12T20:27:00.003+08:00

My God is amazing .
One who truly answers prayer <3

I had forgotten to bring my keys . And i only realised when i was just about to reach home.
I prayed that someone would be at home to open the gate for me.
And miraculously, when i reached the doorstep, my brother had just arrived home too.
:D
So, i didnt have to wait long for someone to open it for me :DDD
AWESOME. SERIOUSLY!

----

Okay, so today.
Volleyball CCA sucked.
Warm-ups , 25 laps of jumping of benches, and running with cass :)
Just for the fun of it .
Did'nt get to play match . <-- :(((((
Got shouted at by crystal, sindy and joy .
Seesh .

----
School was boring too.
English exam , i think i'll be able to pass. Just a pass.
Hoping for the best x)
Maths, I CANNOT STAND MATHS LESSONS. D: seriously.
Science , normal. Laughed and joked with xinping :D
DT , laquered our masterpiece , and then slacked .

Common dismissal , lunch , prefect .

THE END :)

HAPPY BIRTHDAY SINGAPORE!

2011-08-09T22:41:00.002+08:00

Dear Singapore,

Wishing You a HAPPY 46th BIRTHDAY :)

A country filled with happiness & prosperity.

Together as a nation we strived , succeeded, accomplished.

ONE people, ONE nation, ONE Singapore!

I <3 you! My hometown, this is where i belong.
Though i still want to go overseas :/ HEHE.

I LOVEEEEEE YOUUUU SINGAPOREEEEE <3

In a heartbeat, i'll be there for you <3

Cause i'll reach out for the skies , with wings, and i'll soar up high .

But will you?

And there's no place I'd rather be but my island home :)

I HAVENT GOT TO WATCH HARRY POTTER.

and it was kind of a waste that we watched zookeeper instead.

Just cause I could'nt make it for that 3+ time slot .

Sigh :(

In a heartbeat , ill be there for you :)

2011-08-06T21:17:00.002+08:00

I love this year's national day song . <3
Probably going to have gospel practice on national day. But i dont mind, cause i love it :D
And junior girls and guys are going out on the 10th :D
CANT WAIT.
One whole full day of fun and excitement, spent together .
<3 Going to take photographs, run around, laugh like mad, and just ultimately, be happy :D

---
My Friday .
One of the fridays i actually enjoyed :)
Lessons were alright .
Common dismissal was dumb .
Ate lunch @ the canteen , went for the prefect meeting, played volleyball at the parade square , and then went for practice.
Practice was slack as usual. Cause coach didnt come . Actually it doesnt really make a diff whether he comes or not -.-
Useless.

Talked, played.
Waited for the suppliers for the class tee to arrive .
I feel that 2e3 is a little bit more united already :)
<3 LOVE THAT FEELING .
Hope all of us will bond as a class <3
I LOVE YOU 2E3, best class ever!
:))))))

We might be noisy, playful .
But we know how to have fun at the right times.
And when we want to be serious, we can be serious .

----

i'll treasure what i ought to treasure .

2011-07-31T09:18:00.002+08:00

GOOD MORNING :)

Went for YP yesterday .
Glad i went . Cause the lessons were interesting , and i just love the company of my friends <3
We learnt about Esther . And how God , even though not mention, was there with Esther . Always.
And how God made so many things to happen. They weren't coincidences, nor fate / destiny being fulfilled . But God's works.
<3 I trust that God will protect me and continue working in my life <3 :D

YPJG in charge for COPA next next Sunday!
Excited much!
Hand mimes . Glow in the dark. HAHA, super cool ! :D
Practicing today!

----

Lets see, im done with 8 cards.
Left with like 31 more? Stress ~
But i promised. So i'll keep my promise.
I'll get them done :)

DAMN, ms sri didnt post the lit notes!
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO STUDY FOR THE CA EXAM TOMORROW?
>:(
seriously uh.
Teachers always say ," I'll post this on the lms, go take it from there" .
And yeah, till now, NOTHING is up there for us to take.
Geog too! WHERE ARE MY NOTEEEEES :(
I think im freaking out for nothing .
But , well, i just want to do well :(

Reality.

2011-07-28T18:37:00.003+08:00

Hello my fellow blog readers !
Haven't been blogging lately as i didnt have the motivation or 'feel' to.
Life has been pretty much normal.
School, lessons, CCA, home.
You know, the usual :)
Lessons have still been really boring. And teachers cant seem to grab my attention.
I tend to feel sleepy , and hit the table ( fall asleep) .
:(
And that results to me not knowing what i am supposed to know.

----
English - I just hate argumentative essays. I'm not going to become a lawyer, so why are they teaching me how to fight a case? Or something like that. I'm not interested in debating either.

Maths - Getting more familiar with the cones, spheres , pyramids and stuff :D
Slowly improving. Hoping to get good grades for CA and SA! so that i can take add maths.

Chinese - Test today . I wrote some han yu ping ying and English words. I'm bound to get penalised for those mistakes i made too D: But overall, i guess im coping well .

Science - Coping well too :D
I can understand the lessons well.
All i need is to memorise my facts and fomulas. And here comes my A1 :D

Geog - 18/20 for the test! Awesome!
Hoping to take pure geog / or just geog in sec 3 ! History is boring :/

Music, PE, CME, PC, Assembly, HnF .
: I havent had a single music lesson yet in the whole term. 4 and a half weeks has passed already. Oh, and my music exam is coming soon! I am totally NOT prepared.
And i'm feeling nervous . I cant seem to memorise my scales properly.
And i cant sight-read well. AND, i cant sing. YES, I CANNOT SING :(

------

God answers prayers <3
I know this is true. Cause really, he has answered a lot of mine.
Some people might not believe in Him, but I do.
Christianity is not a religion, but a term to say that you have faith and trust in Jesus <3
I mean like, He's always there for me :DDD

----

Prayers He answered :
-That i'll do really well for my geog test though i didnt know how to do the paper . ( ANSWERED)
-That life will slowly improve . (ANSWERED) No more emotional hurt and pain. More of fun , laughter and just so many caring friends surrounding me <3
-That he'll talk to me. (ANSWERED) .. He called me at midnight :O
-That my family would be kept safe and healthy always . (ANSWERED, and currently still being)
-That my mum would agree for me to get the DSLR as she was totally against it at first. When i told her the price. .. But eventually, i got it a few days after <3 (ANSWERED)

I pray everyday for true love.
I pray everyday for true friends.
I pray everyday for health and safety.
I pray everyday for a good day ahead.
I pray everyday for the food taken.
I pray everyday for my family and friends.
I pray everyday for him .
I pray everyday, everyday, everyday, that i'll become a better person.
No vulgarities.
No insulting of people.
No gossiping.
No disrespect.

I'm trying. Hard. To change :)

Monday, week B.

2011-07-18T19:17:00.002+08:00

Actually today was'nt that bad :D
Quite thrilling in fact .
School was hmm, interesting :)
Maths, home econs, F&C , chinese, geog.
Had quite a bit of fun :D

Scored 10/10 for geog, and 25/30 for maths.
Not too bad i guess.
CA IN TWO WEEKS, i cant believe it. Time FLIES! :(
Gonna work hard and score well ! Hopefully ...

----
Subway @ TP after school.
Egg Mayo <3
Popular to get some stuffs ( SECRET, HAHA)
then went to kopitiam to sit :)
I laughed like a mad woman. Or rather, girl.
Tears were coming out :D
And people were staring.
But i could'nt help it. I just kept laughing .
BANANA ROSE. :b

----

Volleyball.
Pathetic coach.
Really.
Only know how to sit there and look at his Iphone -.-
.....
I miss coach Jerry!
MISS MISS MISSSSSS!
:((((

Cried today. For like a minute.
Got hit on the ear by the ball.
Did'nt really hurt actually, but i just broke down emotionally.
So tears wanted to just burst out. :/
Then I sprained the same finger again.
For the 4th time.
:(
Ouch.
BUT I DONT CARE, I WANT TO PLAYYY :)

....

I LOVE YOU GUYS <3
AS IN. MY SCHOOLMATES, CLASSMATES, CHURCHMATES, FRIENDS , MUMMY & DADDY <3

thanks for just being there in my life! :D

Thankyou :)

2011-07-14T16:18:00.002+08:00

To these people :

Cheryl - Thanks for everything babe! For making the class tee and also for entertaining me during the fire drill HAHA :D Had a good lame amount of fun playing and laughing <3

Yikming - My EX-darling </3 Aww.
HAHA, thanks for your concern . I'm alright :)
LIFE IS AWESOME . Cause i have all of your , right? :)
Take care of your ankle and leg <3 :D

Hanmin - HAM!
<3 HAHA.
Thanks for doing the geog slides for me .
Sorry i couldnt come online to do it :( So sorry!
And thanks for just being a good friend to me :)
SMILE ALWAYS DEAR, GET WELL SOON ! :D

Xinping - You're always laughing and giving me that stareeee.
HAHA, eyebrows ^^
:)
Thanks for taking the bus with me . And also for making me laugh like crazy and stuff.
For being there :D
<3

Eunice - YOYO.
:D
Recover soon man! :D So i wont have to give you any more of the sweets :b
LOL. Thank you for being retarded just the way you are. Especially singing during Chinese lesson? HAHA, :)

What are friends for?

2011-07-12T19:54:00.002+08:00

Friends are people who share common interests/goals/excitements with you.
They understand you.
They care for you.
And they are there when they need you.

Will friendship problems arise again?
I hope not.
Okay, so i've been such an ass.
Act cute? Fine, okay, i accept that.
Maybe i should just shut up on facebook.
Like seriously.
Just shut my mouth. Dont comment on anything, dont post anything.
Then maybe problems will be a thing of the past.
:'(
So hurt right now.
I can't tell anybody why.
Please dont make wild guesses.
But yeah, deep down, there's a quieter side of me. Hidden inside. Never wanting to come out.
And there's so much pain right now. I cant explain.
And damn, it hurts just so bad.
Okay, i shouldnt be emo.
Cut the crap.

------

School was as usual , boring.
Certain precious and funny moments <3
but the rest was plain ....
:(
I cant wait till the holidays are here.

Family day !

2011-07-09T21:12:00.002+08:00

So, as the title says, it was family day @ peirce today!
Went to school at around 7.30am :)
Slacked around, explored and did some signs and stuff.
Then i went to become the usherer/money collector/chopper (Person who uses a chomp to stamp someones hand. :D)
4 hrs shift.
Pretty boring :(
But still, had a little bit of fun!
"The Abandoned Child" . Done by 2E3'11 <3
AWESOME! 2nd position in school!
WELL DONE 2E3, HAHAH, good job babes and hunks :)
First was the dunking machine. They earned 900+, according to Mr chan.
-----

What's past is past :)
I'm not hanging on to it.
Shall be happy and move on with life.
Knowing that God has a plan for me.
A good one. An awesome one (:

------

Lemons or lemonade?

2011-07-09T00:17:00.002+08:00

Everytime i tell myself i'm over you, I'm just lying.
Cause i can never get over you.
You're name is stuck in my head.
The texts never deleted, in my phone.
Your face always appearing in front of me.
And just memories of you playing in my head like a broken recorder.
I miss you so much :(
And it just hurts.

I wished God didnt allow me to like any guy.
So that i wont continuously get hurt .
-----

Long chat session with Krysta today <3
Told her my troubles , and she shared her experiences with me.
Helped and encouraged me a lot.
Now, i'm gonna strive to become a better Christian.
To love the Lord and obey Him.
To love everyone else. Including Vanessa . Despite how hard that is.
To stay happy always.
To think positively, and that life is already considered really good :)
THANKYOU <3 totally appreciated.
It's nice to be able to talk to someone who cares. Who is a Christian. Who loves the Lord too (:

-----

Match against Beatty sec.
Won.
But i think i did really badly.
Served out balls.
Didnt block properly.
Receiving not say very stable.
And never got to spike the ball across :(
Wasted. Joy will never let me try again. Cause once bitten, twice shy.
Sigh, she wouldnt take the risk .
....

----
Somehow i dont want to sleep.
I just want to stay here. Doing nth.
Goodness. I just miss you a lot. Like some crazy person.
:(((((((((((

What is this world coming to?

2011-07-07T23:03:00.002+08:00

What's so nice about saying the f word?

Why do people say it all the time? And actually think its cool.

I dont deny i've said it before, but it was only in a moment of impulse when someone really made me mad.

Please, if you want to have sex with someone, wait till you are of age.

...

Hate people who say the word for fun.

And keep repeating it.

=.=

Grow up!

------

SCHOOL was boring!

As usual .

Maths test :D i think i did pretty well :) I hope i'll get full marks! hehe!

Lit test :/ One wrong already :/ Should'nt have changed my answer at the last minute.

Foaly to Root :( Aiyaaaa.

Art - We are doing Artemis Fowl for art. I cant believe it.

This is just horrible.

...

11:11 - I wish that life would be happy and smiley for me always ! :D

fml.

2011-07-06T23:22:00.005+08:00

I still hate that girl.

Sec 1 bitch.

I know i am not supposed to hate. For God says to love.

But i can't help it.

Everytime i see her face, i just feel so yucky and gross inside.

I wish she would just disappear from my life :(

----

Match against AMK today.

Lost. Again.

But nvm, learning experience that counts i guess.

I finally managed to block a ball :)))))

And serve 3 super straight , awesome balls.

JIAYOU ! Last match!

Cass! Recover soon!

Carrie! Maybe you'll get to play on friday! Dont think negatively!

Xinping! Thanks for the compliment. LOLOL. You did well too luh :D

Cheryl! Good try ! :D though you missed some. You did well also. HAHA! JYJY!

A's ! Um, just do your bests :D And jean, seriously. Get a better attitude please.

------

LIEEEEES.

ALL ARE LIEEEEES.

Why must you inflict such hurt on me? :(

fml.

2011-07-06T23:22:00.001+08:00

A brand new day. A brand new experience.

2011-07-05T18:49:00.002+08:00

Today was much better <3
Even though it was kinda boring and stuff.

Went for prefect meeting this morning. After 1 whole week of not going.
Got talked to by WL and josephine :(
And i have to see Mr Ong by tomorrow to get my badge and apologise .
Sigh, im scared.
:( LORD , GIVE ME COURAGE! ..

----

School was okay, i guess.
Star - Slack
PE - Slack.
HnF- Slack. Hehe, i realised i got a text when i checked my phone during recess <3 Brightened up my day man. LOL.
Science- Not too bad :) Hoping to do well in my physics this semester :)
MT - slack.
EL- I slept throughout the whole lesson .. Woops.

Assembly - The best one i ever had in peirce . ( As in given by teachers. Not performance)
About memories, experiences <3

Memories of us are forever etched in my mind ; and heart <3
Good memories to keep, bad memories to throw away and forget :b

Homed. By myself. :/

Did my homework, facebook-ed, listened to some songs, blog.

MATHS TB AND EXERCISE BOOKS, PLEASE APPEAR :(
I cant find them ..

Heart so jet lag.

2011-07-04T21:20:00.002+08:00

Woahhhhh.

You say good morning when its midnight, going out out my head, alone in this bed.

I wake up to the sunset, its driving me mad. I miss you so bad.

Heart heart is so jet lag.

Ah sigh, i miss you

My love life just plainly sucks .

But i know God has a plan for me.

Im just really curious to when that guy will come :(

It sucks waiting ..

Asean games today.

Boring . Waste of time.

=.=

Under the sun. :(

----

Went to watch Mr Popper's Penguin with HM this morning too :D

THE PENGUINS ARE SOOOOO CUTE (Y)

I was giggling and laughing like crazy in the cinema.

The both of us were like the only ones laughing at some parts.

And it was just awkward :b

Anyway, loved the movie.

Penguins <3

PMS.

2011-07-03T23:08:00.002+08:00

I hate love.
I hate life.
I HATE MYSELF.

Why do i get so emotional?
Why do i keep thinking that people are talking about me?
Why am i such an idiot?
Why am i born this way?

I've got all these negative thoughts in my head.
Maybe i'm craving attention as people will say.
But to me, im just letting everything out of my head.
To write it down.

I cried again today.
For no rhyme or reason.
Just because i felt sad.
Retarded much.
What am i coming to?
I'm telling people to smile and be happy, but i cant even do it myself anymore.
I get so pissed of at the slightest things.
And i just cant stop thinking about the past.
So actually everyone knows what had happened. But only pretended not to.
Nobody told me.

(Nothing to do with my class ppl)

...
FML.
I just feel like im useless.
Worthless.

And tears are coming down again.
DAMMIT LA.
=.=

Post no. 234 :)

2011-07-02T21:24:00.002+08:00

HELLO :D

Okay, so i skipped church today. Again.

I suck as a Christian. Seriously.

I know it doesnt mean that if you go to church, you're a Christian, neither if you dont go to church, you're not a Christian.

Its just that the time spent with God is less. So much less.

And i cant go next week.

Cause of family day, and a movie after that <3

Boring day today.

Did some housework. Ironing, cleaning etcetc.

It's so annoying when elijah does'nt have to do anything but go out or bum at home all day long.

Seesh, boys.

Arm still having that big blue-black (or rather red-black)

Doesnt hurt much though :)

Hope it'll recover soon.

And to carrie & xinping & cheryl. RECOVER SOON :D <3

So we can play our best for the last 2 matches.

JIAYOUJIAYOUJIAYOU!

I dont want to fall in love.

But it's just human nature to.

I just miss you. A lot. Too much .

2011-07-01T18:16:00.003+08:00

1. Volleyball.
2. My love life.
3. Someone's secret i'm very very curious to know about. (not Yikming)
4. I'm just tired. Deprivation of sleep.
5. I realised my studies aint improving. They're getting worse.

So, well, we lost the match again today.
I was at fault. Missed so many of the balls.
Was on the verge of crying, of breaking down. Just because i could'nt accept i was wrong.
I could'nt accept criticism, i could'nt accept scoldings.
I felt like punching someone right in the face then.
But obviously i wouldnt.

Our team was so quiet on court.
It was like we were playing a silent game.
No laughter, no cheers(besides ace), no encouragement (only scoldings) , no calling of names, and no hyperness.
It was like how we played against Peicai.
Why were we like that? i'll never know .
Everyone's mood was just down.
Including mine.
I'm so sorry for making so many mistakes. I'm sorry for not jumping as high as your want me to.
It's not that i dont want to , i did try.
Sorry .

----
I miss you like crazy.
You'll never understand, never know.
I feel like we're so distant.
I just wished we could be closer, much closer <3
I love you <3

----
AHH.
You know, its really interesting to find out who someone likes.
So, yeah, i'm dying to know who someone likes.
Cause its just so unexpected for him to fall in love.
He just seems like that kind of guy who does'nt care a thing about relationships and stuff.
(I'm talking about a senior :b)
Well, im just sooooo curious! Kaypoh :b

---
Okay, i shall get some good rest today .

----
I can't be bothered to study.
I give up.
I dont want to anymore.
DAMMIT :(
I HATE EVERY SINGLE SUBJECT.
NOW INCLUDING ENGLISH.
I HATE ARGUMENTATIVE ESSAYS.
DAMN.

I should stop saying all those words. Seriously.
But i cant help it, it just comes out naturally.
Habit.

SORRY :(
to my volleyball team mates .
to people i've said nasty things about them behind their backs. (eg. joy i know i should'nt have. )
to coach.
to branden.
to hanmin. I just feel that i haven't been that good a friend to you. :/
to all those i said , SMILE ALWAYS to. Cause i know its hard to at times.
But just try. As how i'm doing now.
;)

Depression .

2011-07-01T18:11:00.002+08:00

I dont know why i'm feeling stressed up, disappointed, moody.
And all these emotions are causing me to get hungry. Very hungry.
And in the mood to just keep eating.
So thats what i've been doing.
Im gonna put on weight again .
Damn.
But i cant help it.
Lets see what i've eaten for today.
3 pieces of bread.
9 pieces of jackfruit (school)
1 sushi
1 plate of kuay teow
2 fish
3 steamed kueh thing.
1 packet of milo ( i drank it, not eaten)
A lot of MIC sweets .

Walao, thats a lot ley ;(
I'm feeling so damn suckish now .
:(((( AND I DONT KNOW WHY.
Okay, maybe i do know why.

1. Volleyball.
2. My love life.
3. Someone's secret i'm very very curious to know about. (not Yikming)
4. I'm just tired. Deprivation of sleep.
5. I realised my studies aint improving. They're getting worse.

Shall elaborate on this things on the next post :)

dont let me go.

2011-06-27T19:20:00.002+08:00

Never say never -The Fray (y)
Dont let me go, dont let me go, dont let me goooo . <3

1st day of school after holidays.
Pretty much the same . Probably a little better though :D
English was ... I slept in class. :/
But maths, PE and science were all okay okay. Average :)

Went for competition at Peicai.
Sucks.
Hate it there.
Lost to them .
But its okay, we're winners in our hearts, and we know it.
We could have done better though . JIAYOU KAY? we mustnt give up.
Strive harder, do a little more . Together <3
I prayed to God for us to win.
But He didnt give me what i wanted.
He has His own plans for me.
And i'll let Him decide whats best.

:) Do not fear. For God is with me <3
Thanks Jianing for the encouragement :))))

-----

I just hate it how its so difficult to lie to everyone .
But i have to.
My secrets . That only you, me and God knows .
:(
But i guess i kinda got used to it .
Which is bad.
I should stop lying.
But its for my good. Your good. Everybody else's good.
Okay, enough of my weirdo talking to myself. Bye :)

Music is my life.

2011-06-25T23:43:00.000+08:00

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3

I LOVE MUSIC.

MATCH ON MONDAY,

SOOO NERVOUS :((((

CANT STAND IT . OHNOO.

FOOD. FUN. FRIENDS :D

2011-06-25T12:52:00.003+08:00

Yesterday was a truckload of fun only because of photography and the company of friends <3

Bused and trained to J8 to meet HM and XP.

Waste my time ~

Went there to buy 2 tubes of paint only.

Then trained and bused to cheryl's house.

I could have gone there straight! Nearer! :O

Did the banner thing.

Kinda fail at first, cause the paint kept drying and fading off.

But overall, turned out pretty alright.

Hanmin is the flower holder! :D LOLOL.

Bused to Novena.

Ate at Hans :D FnC for everyone!

And we were trying to guess what was the dessert.

Tasted like vanilla and a little bit of almond, but had the bouncy texture of eggs.

Tsk~

XP hated it.

Went MIC. Bought Peachy Peace ^^

Gonna eat it in school~

CAN'T BELIEVE SCHOOL IS STARTING.

NOOOOO.

:( SO FAST.

Taxi-ed down to ECP after that :)

We let HM sit in front.

Hehe :D

Sorry ahh.

Found the pits easily.

It was near the pit we booked last year.

Went to rent bicycles.

Taught Hanmin. But failed.

So just left her there alone ba.

Cycled on and on :D

I cycled once to dunno where.

And cycled twice to the shop and back :D Good exercise man.

My slipper flew out when i was riding back with the water.

Paiseh max. HAHAH.

:((((

Ate a few sausaged and a piece of ham for dinner. Pathetic .

SORRY TO YIKMING OKAY?

I'm sorry for complaining so much.

Thanks for getting us the food <3

Cam-whored after that. Awesome stuff :D

Homed.

Fb till 1am + .

Tagging photos for XP, spamming her noti :D

Heheee.

Tiring Thursday.

2011-06-23T17:43:00.002+08:00

Woke up at 10.50 this morning.

Actually earlier.

But i kept waking up, and falling back asleep .

So i officially woke up at that time :D

...

I was super sleepy still though.

:(((

Yawning the whole day. Feeling like going back to dreamland.

Headed out for lunch with parents and bro .

Ate at some restaurant.

Nice food :D

And the most funniest thing was that we were sitting beside a fish tank.

And they had very interesting fishes.

One that swam vertically. (like straight up. Doesnt swim horizontally)

One that looks dead.

One that swim on its back. (like lie flat on its back. HAHA)

Laughing at what the fishes were doing with my bro.

Retarded much.

I bet the other people in the restaurant thought we were weird.

Oh well :D

---

Then went to get some food at the Japan fair.

A lot of yummy stuff <3

We bought 137 dollars worth of food there.

HAHA.

Crazy la. Spend so much >.<

heheee.

Then went to the optician to get some things done.

Homed.

Holidays just seem too short :(

2011-06-23T17:36:00.002+08:00

Busy week !

I can't remember what i did on tuesday though.

Oh well :)

Yesterday was a crazy, tiring, sad, but nevertheless, still awesome day.

Volleyball early in the morning.

Not much of a training as it was super slack :/

Went to J8 for lunch :D

Bought gongcha milktea with white pearl. My first time trying :)

Then ate at foodcourt.

I should seriously bring more money out.

So sorry to carrie, cass and beth . To whom i owe money to.

I'll pay your back once i see your :D

no worries. SORRY!

Took coach's car to Christchurch Sec.

Car ride was epic.

Cass had a headache cause of his car.

Tsk.

Played our matches there.

Lost the first 2.

Won the 3rd.

But didnt get to finish playing the 3rd match cause Cheryl got injured :(

They brought her to staff room, then general office, then sick bay, then hospital.

LOL.

Over caring and concern people there :D

Not like peirce though.

Peirce staff are -.- Well most .

Pei-ed her in the hospital till 7+ for her check up and stuff.

Shall not go into details :b

Then went to church in her car :)

Had practice till 10.

And i was starving.

Haven't eaten dinner at that time. :(((((

GASTRIC.

Bus-ed home, and reached about 10.30.

Ate a little bit of food then went to use the comp till about 1am .

Fell asleep after that :D

----

20th June .

2011-06-20T23:03:00.003+08:00

Sigh. Im so bored :(

Woke up several times this morning, but was lazy to get out of bed.

So i stayed in it till 11+ .

And i was still feeling extremely sleepy when i finally got out.

Toasted bread for breakfast <3

Nutella and also Kaya. (on separate pieces of course)

Sorted out some of my clothes .

Cause my wardrobe was super messy.

Then went to laze around the house.

So sorry for not going out today for the movie :(

I really mean the apology.

Regretted now.

But i really couldnt make it .

Sorrrrry :(

Next time okay?

I feel like such an ass for treating you so meanly.

Maybe you wont notice.

But, i havent exactly been talking to you with like interest.

I've been like, haha, ok, and boring stuff like that.

Didnt really talk properly.

Sorry.

Gosh, whats wrong with me? -.-

sigh.

---

I'm so confused right now.

Over so many things.

Okay, maybe just one.

Topic : LOVE.

I shant talk about it here.

It shall be my own secret ,

haha.

I just hope the week will be a good , fun , awesome one.

Class BBQ, church outings, visit to optician, YP and church <3

Hoping that he'll be mine someday .

My life.

2011-06-19T20:13:00.002+08:00

Hello! I'm back again :)

I'm blogging cause i am seriously , extremely bored.

Did'nt really do much today .

Went to church, ate @ Mac with WQ and Mel.
Saw Rongyao.
And i was super embarrassed when i could'nt empty the rubbish on the tray properly.

And a packet of fries dropped on the floor.

HAHA. He helped me to pick it up.

Thankyou!

Gosh. I am never clearing my tray EVER AGAIN. Using one hand.

Bused home.

And watched TV for around 2 hours.

Chinese drama. Maybe my chinese will improve cause of it :/

Then um, a little of homework.

+ Housework.

And then dinner :)

Japanese food. Cooked by my bro.

Folded clothes.

And here i am.

Now i gotta go.

BATH TIME :D

My God works miracles.

2011-06-19T13:26:00.002+08:00

He healed my broken heart.

He made me happy once again <3

----

Fate or coincidence?

Lets hope its fate.

Went to church again today .

Had a session on crowns and rewards. Interesting :D

By brother Roy Hill.

I'm sad i could'nt make it for ABC :( They seemed to have had a lot of fun.

I shall go next year! Hehe!

Saw CN with specs :D

I smiled :))))

He looks as retarded in specs as i do.

I also happened to wear specs today cause i was lazy with my contacts.

hehehehehe..

Cant help but feel he's looking.

But i'm sure he's not.

Just my weirdo conscience , thats all.

CANT WAIT FOR YOUTH CAMP <3

hope he goes!

----

We shall be friends . Good friends, best friends :D <3

Thanks for the experience?

Loveee you always <3

------

PASTAMANIA <3

... You know what i mean.

Happy Father's Day Daddy :)

2011-06-19T00:08:00.001+08:00

The title says it all <3

Thank you Daddy for always being there for me.

For cooking my food.

For buying me stuff .

For protecting me always :D

Thank you <3

It's great to have a dad like you.

I'm glad and happy and elated and :D to have you ! HEHE.

STAY HEALTHY AND HAPPY ALWAYS!

All the best in your business!

Earn more moneyyy.

Yet another Friday .

2011-06-17T23:37:00.002+08:00

Friggin' awesome day today <3

Finally got to go out and get some fresh air :D

Met with Yikming on the bus and went to amk to meet the rest .

We were'nt the latest :D

Trained down to bugis. Walked to middle road the party shops there.

Viewed some stuff for family day .

Then went to iluma? :D

Yikming & Hanmin went to watch a movie -.-

Sigh.

Its been a long time since yikming has been able to come out.

And when she can, she decides to watch a movie .

HEEYER.

Hope she can go out more often!

soooooon.

----

Camwhored at the skypark.

And i estimated the time the security guard would come to chase us out.

And i was right ^^

well , almost! HAHA.

Then went to bugis street .

Got my blue shoes <3 and reglan tee too! Purple this time ! HAHA.

Saw JiaYi there. And it was damn awkward la ;(

-----

Ummm, Ohyeah. We went to eat pasta!

HAHA.

Laughed like mad in the restaurant.

I almost choked :p

I LOVE CHEESE ! HEHEHEH.

-----

Then went to um, plaza sing .

Spotlight.

Boring la.

But had to go to find the banner thing :)

Doing it on wed! Cant wait ! HAHA.

Cotton on!

Bought 2 shorts :D

Finally.

HEHE.

Then taxi-ed to amk with CT, CC, HM.

Taking pictures in the car. ^^

retarded.

Trying to upload the photos now.

But my phone just wont connect to the com.

Seeeeshhhh.

IM SO TIRED.

BUT I HAD A FUN, HAPPY DAY.

Thank you for friends in my life <3

I'm glad that we're friends again.
And i hope it stays that way dears.

HAHA.

BYEEEEEE !

2011-06-17T00:46:00.002+08:00

Cause i always knew that the day would come when i'm not enough to make you stay.

You tell me its not possible, no way that we could break.

Nothing is illogical, believe me.

Like falling stars over your head, we were bound to burn out burn like, crashing cars i'll never get , over you, never over you cause you are sooooo, beautiful yeah :D

I love you <3

Love hurts .

2011-06-16T22:31:00.002+08:00

AIYA.
I should stop holding onto someone who will just keep on hurting me .
Whats the point right?

Hurt?

-No more texts.

-No more calls.

-Broken promises (even though it cant be helped)

-Pointless conversations . That probably cant even be counted as conversations.

-No more love.

-Friendship? Yeah right.

I'll shall give up.

I love you.

But i shall wait for time to pass till i fully give up.

Now, i shall just give up hope?

Idk.

Gosh.

Im never gonna stop loving you.

Till that day someone elses loves me.

Cause every single person deserves a person who loves them a lot. Dearly. Forever & always.

And i'll wait.

For now, I dont mind being friends.

As long as you continue talking to me every single damned day.

Cause thats what I wished for. And you said it was a simple wish.

So fulfill it for me then.

HAH.

THANKYOU :D

2011-06-16T16:49:00.000+08:00

THANKS FOR THE TAGS BABES ! :)

Appreciated!

Glad to know my blog isnt that dead and unwanted .

:D HAHAH.

AND THANK YOU TO MEL, YIKMING, TRIXIE, HANMIN.

For all the concern ;)

Im alright. REALLY.

IM A HAPPY GIRL.

Dont have to worry about me going emo and stuff :)

Life is full of ups and downs.

And i'll never give up , no matter what.

I'll live life to the fullest :D

BE HAPPY. AND SMILE :D

For smiling is contagious. And its healthy!

:DDDDDDDDD

THANKS TO THE VOLLEYBALL GIRLS & OUR VERY BHB , "NON-GAY" , FISHJOY GAME LOVER COACH! :D

-For laughter, madness , awesomeness during training!

-For bullying coach :P

-TO COACH : FOR MAKING US LAUGH LIKE CRAZY WITH YOUR HAHA-NESS.

AIYA, you're a good coach! Friendly! Thanks for taking time to train us :D

Though we know you just want your pay, thats all -.-

-C'DIV VB-LLERS. JIAYOU OKAY, NEVER GIVE UP.

NEVER SAY NEVER. whatever i said it thrice.

But, dont give up la! We will do our best next next week and the next next next week ! :D

^^ I LOVE YOU VOLLEYBALL-ERS

AND VOLLEYBALL.

AND FRIENDS <3

AND THOSE PEOPLE WHO I MIGHT NOT KNOW, WHO ACTUALLY CARE FOR ME <3

AND THE GUY WHO ONCE MADE ME HAPPY :)

Im H-A-P-P-Y!

2011-06-16T16:43:00.002+08:00

Tired tired tired.

Training again this morning :D

Ran 20 rounds for warm up (sian ..)

Did stretching and starjumps .

Then did 500 digging against the wall without dropping .

( MY SWEAT WAS GOING INTO MY EYES -.- so irritating :( )

And after that, digging across the net.

Didnt complete that though :O

Coach made us do spiking and 'FANG QIU'. Um drop ball?

Sien. I can't spike properly anymore. Timing all wrong again.

And i cant jump high enough :(

I shall jump more at home then! HEHE.

Then, PT? :(

10 laps of suicide. (crazy enough . -.- )

Walk sideways and bend all the way down . (Take a step, bend , take a step, bend )

AND. (yes still ...)

Zig zag bending .

LOL . LEGS PAIN :(

BUT WHATEVER. NO TRAINING TOMORROW. WHOOPEEE! :D

GOING OUT OUT OUT.

HOORAY!

LOL.

I dont care anymore

I love you. The end.

I just wish we could talk .

More.

More than before.

In the end, it doesnt even matter .

2011-06-15T23:00:00.002+08:00

FML. Fish my life.

----

COACH IS OBSESSED WITH HIS FISHY GAME ON HIS IPHONE. HAHA.

He keeps playing it before training and during training.

Slacker la >:(

Volleyball was boring .

Im gonna pon it on friday i guess .
To go out and have some FUN for once in this holiday.

----

I love you boy.

But do you do the same?

Guess not.

You dont care anymore.

Times change, Things change, people change.

Screw my love life .

Actually i dont feel that sad .

HAHA.

I DONT KNOW WHY.

IM GOING CRAZY :)

yes HAHAHAHHAHA.

RKKT, <3 I've missed liking you.

But nah, im not gonna fall for you again.

Cause i know im never gonna be good enough for you :)

---

Im so bored at home everyday.

I want to go out. Walk . Explore. Discover.

Get rid of all the negative thoughts in my head.

Gosh.

I LOVE VOLLEYBALL .

OKAY, ZAI JIAN.

I missed talking to you.
A lot.

If you're reading this, just to let you know.

I'll never give up.

Cause that should be me .

I <3 you.

2011-06-15T08:23:00.001+08:00

Time to let go?

I hate that girl >:(

Damn.

Make me feel all disgusting and furious inside.

Yes. Jealousy again.

And im thinking about things.

Might not be true.

But oh well.

Girl's sense.

Haha, goodbye .

Wo Ai Ni,

2011-06-14T00:14:00.002+08:00

Happy 1 month dear <3

I bet you forgot, but never mind, i remembered.

Its been one month already.

Loser sign to those who said we couldnt last this long.

HAH.

Thanks for everything and anything <3

For the care shown, for the love given.

I may be jealous at times, but that means i care a lot.

Sorry for getting mad >:(

I love you always <3

And i hope you'll do the same. I wish to keep you forever dear piggy .

May we get closer somehow , someway, someday.

Cause you know, i'll always be there for you if you need me.

So yeah, i love you :D see you soon <3

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 HEARTS FOR YOU. LOL.

2011-06-13T21:59:00.002+08:00

If i have done anything wrong, tell me , i'll improve, i'll change.

Im sorry.

Sigh.

13 June :)

2011-06-13T18:35:00.002+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO JUSTINO <3 I MISS YOU !
You're one of the coolest teachers at APS. IT ^^
See you soon , i hope ! And Alan Tan too <3 :D

HAHA HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO RACHEL KOH TOO! :DDD

Training today was shiok.
Why? Cause i sweated like mad again.
I was dripping sweat everywhere after running so many rounds :D
Gross, HAHA, I KNOW! :D
Did running, side steps, cross steps, jumping thing, digging, spiking, receiving. The usual :)
Then went to J8 to have lunch .
---
Trained to Kovan , and took the bus down to PLMGS.
Its dione's school :D just realised .
Man, its huge. And it looks so futuristic with the greyish walls and stuff :D
We got lost inside , and the security guard and the general office staff gave us the wrong directions -.-
Luckily some nice uncle led us to the ISH .

Their court is weird.
...

Lost first 3 matches and won the last 2.
I felt like crying during the second match .
Felt like screaming at the opponents and at coach.
So f...ed up at that point in time -.-

But got better after that :)
MY SERVICE IS AWESOME <3 and everyone agrees HAHA.
the ball is super straight, just over the net :D
And the opponents couldnt receive it for like 3-4 times <3 hehe.

----
Went Nex again for awhile then came home .
Home sweet home :D

----

Dont want to go for training tomorrow.
Coach promised us a hell of a time cause we lost the match D:
sigh.

------

I loved the talk i had with cass on the train :D
Agreed with her totally about something :D
Finally someone knows what im thinking .
..
I want the relationship to be sweet and loving , and close.
Maybe someday it'll be that way .
(:
Hoping for the best i guess :)
I love you dear <3

Sunday .

2011-06-12T17:20:00.003+08:00

Another week has passed .

Man does time fly :(

2 weeks of the June holidays is gone. And I haven't even started on my homework.

1 more full week of volleyball training till we get a break! :D

But there might be training on the last week. They're still deciding :)

----

Woke up several times today.

Kept waking up then sleeping again.

In the end, woke up at around 1+ to have lunch :D

Skipped church :/ And i feel so damn bad.

Sorry :(

I LOVE YOU GOD <3

I want to go closer to Him! :(

Cant wait for youth camp again! Sad i couldnt attend ABC during June cause of training :/

Sigh, maybe next time.

---

I am dying to go shopping .

Someone! Someday!

---

2011-06-11T22:57:00.001+08:00

I think soon, i'm going to cough out my lungs and sneeze out my nostrils or something.

PAIN LIKE SHIT :(

OUCH. TT

Life is :(

2011-06-11T21:02:00.002+08:00

Overslept today :(

Woke up at 7+ , and had to rush around the house to get ready .

We were supposed to meet at 7.20am, so i was freaking out.

I took a taxi down to AMK mrt .

And in the end, they were still at Macs -.-

I should have took the bus and save my money :(

And because i was rushing around, i forgot to bring my knee guards and towel .

Thanks RouHui <3 for lending me hers :)

Sorry for sweating in it! gosh , disgusting >.<

---

Trained down to PasirRis Sec :D

And had our match there.

5 matches, we lost all again.

But the numbers were so damn close! 24:25, 24:26 etc.

Only the last match was a failure. 1:25 , as we were probably ready to lose .

Pathetic .

JIAYOU VOLLEYBALL C'DIV!

We must win la k! MUST IMPROVE AND WORK ON OUR MISTAKES !

At least we are all more bonded now <3 awesome.

----

Lunch at Nex.

Plus sogurt and some dessert stuff :D

Then trained home.

----

We are no longer close.

And that sucks.

I wish to keep you forever. :)

11 june 2011

2011-06-11T00:34:00.002+08:00

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BHYQ <3 .

I LOVE YOU .

HAHA.

HAVE AN AWESOME BIRTHDAY!

THANK YOU. For the things you've done to make me happy.

SORRY. For getting mad always.

AND,

SMILEEEEEE.! :DDDDDDD

...i . am . angry .

2011-06-09T23:22:00.003+08:00

One day.

Either you leave or i leave first.

I dont want that to happen. Never.

But somehow i dont feel the love.

Not even a little.

So what if there are words? Actions dont prove a single thing you said.

Where did our long talks all go to?

Where did the promises you made disappear to?

I dont want to give a shit.

But i cant .

Cause i care too much.

Cause i love you too much.

I get jealous like crap when you talk to other girls.

But i never tell you .

Cause i dont want you to say that im over protective and stuff.

But all i want is for you to be mine.

So I just hope that someday you'll learn to treasure what you have more.

And not take it for granted.

Sorry . I am pissed.

So pardon all the words used.

AUSTRALIA.

2011-06-09T13:49:00.002+08:00

I MISS AUSTRALIA SO MUCH.

Im envious of YikMing .

I just want to get out of Singapore for a while.

Maybe a month or so.

I want to lead a carefree life out there.

Playing, laughing , having no worries at all.

I miss the ducklings and the pond in Australia :)

the cool breeze and the cool bridges and places there.

I miss fremantle.

Known for the best fish and chips or something.

The wind there is super SHIOK :D

Just thinking back makes me sad .

It'll probably be years till i get to go there again :(

I miss so many things there.

-Waking up and being able to step on a cold floor. (no air-con)

-The people. MAN THEY ARE FRIENDLY.

So unlike singaporeans ! seesh!

-Being able to just roam around freely with no fear of getting banged down by cars. Cause the neighbourhood where i stayed hardly had much cars driving around.

-BEACH! THE SAND IS AWESOME, AND SO IS THE WATERS :)

Soft sand, and crystal blue clear waters.

Unlike Singapore's polluted dirty water.

I know i shouldnt compare countries.

But i just miss Australia so much >.<

Sorrryyyyy.

ONE THING I DONT MISS THAT IS :)

The annoying flies . A lot of them! =.=

A guy best friend .

2011-06-09T13:42:00.003+08:00

I want one!

A guy who i can pour out my troubles to.

A guy who i will not fall in love with .

A guy who will always be there for me :)

A guy who cares when others bullies me.

A guy who will stand by my side.

A guy who will treat me well.

A guy who i wont be shy around .

A guy who i can talk with for ages without getting bored.

A guy who wont talk to other girls.

A guy who will celebrate my birthday with me.

A guy who might plan a surprise party just for me.

A guy who i can laugh ; play ; study with , without any fear of anything .

But i guess a guy like that will never come my way.

I get jealous so easily.

And i get mad too.

Sigh.

I want to stop hating the sec 1s.

They've done nothing wrong.

So why do i hate them so much?

i dont know.

Maybe its cause they're prettier, more sociable and stuff.

Im jealous uh?

thats damn stupid.

I feel like a retard -.-

Nobody knows what im thinking besides God.

And if i choose to hide something from people, i will.

Blogging is kinda ... -.-

Cause i have to put up my feelings onto somewhere where anybody/everybody can read.

But its good cause i get to let what i am thinking in my mind, out.

As we go on, we remember .

2011-06-09T13:36:00.002+08:00

My thumb hurts like crap .

Ouch . :(

But i dont regret blocking that ball, cause we gained a point for that :D

I should seriously work on my setting .

Its the 4th day of intensive training for volleyball!

Coach Jerry came today <3

Haha, miss him soooo much! He's much more strict, firm but also funnier than the other coach :)

He's coming again tomorrow! But i dont know if anyone's going for training .

Match against queenstown yesterday!

Lost badly.

Peirce : Queenstown

23:25

20:25

(some low score) :25

(another pathetic score) :25

(much better! but still lost) :25

I think we did'nt do our best. We could have done better.

But its alright.

The team is more bonded now :D

WE MUST JIAYOU FOR COMPETITION BABES.

Another friendly match on saturday, and also on monday!

Cant wait! Hope everyone can go :(

----------

1 June . Man does time fly :/

2011-06-01T21:28:00.003+08:00

It seemed like sec 1 orientation was just a few days ago. But it has been a year and a few months. Wow.

I miss those sec 1 days when everyone was so innocent , caring and friendly .

Now , everyone's true colours show. And its not a pretty sight.

Ive changed too. I guess.

---

Speech day!

Played basketball and volleyball in the morning :D

I love these two sports.

I miss APS basketball ttm . I remembered all those awesome memories we had together.

Training and matches :) Sigh.

Gonna have vb competition too .
On the same dates as the sports leadership thing! So maybe i dont have to go :p

Hope we will win.

Or at least make the effort to.

Jiayous :D

VIP came into the ISH. Watched us for like a minute , and then walked out.

Super pointless.

But overall, i had lots of fun laughing and playing during the rehearsals .

Thanks to the basketballers, volleyballers, um netballers and some random other people for everything :DDDDDD

Anywayyyyy.

I HAVE CAMP TMR!

And its 9.33 pm, and i have not packed my bag.

Sigh. So lazy to.

I hope i get grouped with fun-going , friendly people xD

HEHE.

I love you bhyq ♥

OKAY, GOODBYE .

FOR 3 days :) i shall enjoy camp. I hope.

Im gonna miss home. :(
Especially my bolster ♥

Music :D

2011-05-30T17:41:00.002+08:00

No piano lessons till next month :D
SLACK.
But exams are round the corner, so i got to practice hard :)
Playing all the fast songs . Hope i dont make any mistakes.

Anyway, i love listening to music .
Certain lyrics are really meaningful, while some just make totally no sense.
But the tunes are catchy :D
And some songs remind me of people .
Which either makes me sad, or happy (:
HAHA.
Spent my day reading Harry potter again .
For the dont know how many'th time :/
Its interesting though ^^ Almost half way through the book .
Man, im such a bookworm :D
----

I hate snakes.
I hate reptiles.
They gross me out :(
Just the sound of them creep me outtttttt.
YUCKS . :(

okay, random.

Bye.
:D

blahhhh.

2011-05-29T21:27:00.002+08:00

Jealousy is stupid stupid stupid.

But it just shows how much i am in love .

Sigh.

Dont even know why im jealous.

Seesh :>

My brain is getting screwed up .

Haha :D

Benjamin is random.

And Hanmin is <3d :D

Sorry for the misunderstanding.

Or, well kinda.

But its cleared up :D

awesome :)

No. 201 post :D

2011-05-29T20:38:00.002+08:00

My blog is just like an online diary where i can just let everything out.

Whoever might be reading, i dont know :/

Cause the tagbox seems dead. But oh well, doesnt matter as long as i can say all i want to say :)

---

Pretty boring sunday .

Went to church in the morning , and had song practice for gospel next week :D HEHE. performing . And yes, i am excited .

I shall not think of stuff that will make me unhappy .

Cause i want to smile.

I want my life to be filled with happiness , laughter . Not sadness and darkness :(

SOO, I SHALL BE HAPPY AND SMILE .

Cause a smile is a curve that sets things right. Xiao yi xiao, jiu mei you shi guo bu liao de.

Just smile , and there is nothing you cant overcome.

Okay, not that true, but yeahhh, YOU GET MY POINT :D

----

Watching glee now :D season 2 ! Finally got to watch it after sooooo long.

Wanting to talk to him. But he's probably busy .

Anyway, HAPPY EARLY BIRTHDAY JING CHUNG :)

Have an awesome birthday ! (:

-----

ALL THE BEST TO THE SEC 4s TAKING their O levels tmr too! :DDD

JY ELIJAH ! you dont even know there is o level tmr. Sigh, you are pathetic :)

Just do your best ! And just dont flunk it. HAHA, JIAYOU xD

Such deceitful little lies .

2011-05-28T00:09:00.003+08:00

All just plain lies . Whats the point? Ive lost my trust in all of you already .

Its okay. Maybe we all arent meant to be :)

I've done nothing wrong, and i have a clear conscience.

It all started with your calling me names . I can be sure of that .

Im sorry if i have done anything shitty things that have caused you to hate me without knowing . But seriously, bitching behind my back?

At least just tell me in the face okay? I dont hate your .

Im just wondering what i have done to deserve this. Really.

I dont want my sec school life to be screwed upside down.

I want a HAPPY life. One that i can keep smiling through :D

So please dont make my life miserable with the lies .

--------

Last day of school before the holidays :D

Had History, english , science and MT today .

I slept throughout science . Had a gooooood nap :D

Did'nt bother listening to Ms Pang. I was too sleepy to.

Im really wondering if i should take a pure science or not.

Cause if i do, it might be bio (according to mock streaming), which i dont really want to .

But neither do i want to take physics. I want chem :(

And it sucks when im not allowed to take Add math with pure geog . WHY ;(

They didnt give me the combination i wanted. Sigh.

Hope i'll improve tremendously and get the combination i want :DDD

------

KUNGFU PANDA 2 .

Po was SO CUTE when he was young .

My heart goes out to it :D AWWW.

Now i want a panda as a pet.

Okay, not really. But seriously, hehe. The way it smiled, laughed, cried, played, ate, bathed. All super cute :p

Anyway, watched with the E1 guys instead of E3 girls (oh well, wasnt invited. what to do , what to do :) )

I love you BH <3

We shall last long okay , a few years i hope .

Love you lots and lots and lots .

Thanks for today :D

as life goes on :)

2011-05-24T21:59:00.003+08:00

to the person who sent that sms :

Thank you :D though i dont know who you are. Its not his fault, so dont blame him k :) Yeah, if you're wondering how things are like right now, its getting better :D so yeah, no worries ! If you see this, could you tell me who you are? Dont have your number :>

IM SOOOOOOOO SLEEPY.

I had 3 hours of sleep yesterday. :>

2.30-5.30 am. I could have died .

Super exhausted. So, im going to sleep early today . GOODNIGHT :D HEHE.

Sigh :(

2011-05-22T09:45:00.003+08:00

Love is just so irritating .

It's in my mind 24/7, even when im sleeping .

I think of him day and night . And always wished that he loved me back the same. 100% .

It's been such a confusing week . And i just thank God for pulling me through.

Camp was really sucky . And i hated the part when i almost cried cause i was thinking too much about something . I went all emo and stuff :(

Maybe being with him isnt the best of things to do, but i really am in love with him.

He confuses me all the time. Suddenly he's all sweet and stuff, but the next day he's cold . So, which am i supposed to believe? I dont know anymore .

I wish RKKT could still be an option for me . :/

Exam results . I got really horrible grades. But i still thank God for helping me do the papers , that even though i didnt study much, i passed every single subject , and topped English in class .

I hope that i'll study more , and get better grades next time .

Anyway, I really feel very heartbrokened now . It really hurts to see someone you love flirting with other girls . It really does . And all i think is about him . Im not kidding .

And gullible? I dont think so. I just choose to believe whatever you say because i love you . I dont want to ruin the chance for myself . I could just have a mind of my own and go against you, but i didnt. Cause i didnt want to . Anyway, Love hurts . And jealously kills .

Amanda

2011-05-07T21:37:00.001+08:00

Sometimes you're a nice friend, sometimes you are just plain irritating.

I shall just speak my heart out.

I dont get it why you have to criticize people so much .

No one on this earth is perfect :)

As cheryl said, beauty comes from within . Not that much of the outside that counts. Though it still does luh.

You've been nice and all to me. Thanks for that :D

And thanks for lending me all those books . (the so called rape books) - which actually is NOT about .

yeah, see you in school :D

The wonders in life .

2011-05-07T21:33:00.003+08:00

YP - learnt about prayer and quiet time :D

Lesson filled with a lot of laughing . Awesomeness <3

Though its good to see so many people attending YP, it kinda sucks when theres so many people playing captains ball. Can't even get the ball -.-

... And when i do get it, i drop it . Butter fingers :(

-----

Since i've told you what i have been longing to, then ill leave everything else to God :D

That He will make the decisions in my life for me, for He is perfect, and makes no mistake.

Its just that you make me confused at times.

And i dont know what to believe.

But it doesnt matter :) Cause im contented. Happy .

I SHALL DO THE POSTS TO PEOPLE THING TOO! :D

the one cheryl/xin ping has been doing . Shall go by register number :)

So what if i love you?

2011-05-04T16:01:00.002+08:00

Life, sigh . People come and go .
It always starts out happily, but you cant guarantee a happy ever after kind of ending .
:( Heart brokened?
Haha, dumb much .

Friends are awesome people who care and make you laugh :D
I hope the ties between us have been mended .
Your have been really nice to me :)
Thanks for everything !
My life has been full of smiling and laughter in school because of your xD
LOVEEEEE !

The boys in my life .

2011-05-01T22:05:00.005+08:00

I know none of you will be able to read this, but oh well, since im bored :D

Ace T , Jon Ng, Dex T , Caius K.

My awesome churchmates . Well not anymore, cause you're dont attend already.I miss your ttm . Remember the times we played blind mice together? We destroyed the playhouse and pull down the leaves of the tress :/ Fond memories of your are stuck in my head. I wish your will come back soon <3 Especially A ! cause i asked you to before :(

Jon, idk why you dont come to church anymore. Cause your bro does! Come with him kk!

Caius, haha, you're overseas! Visit Spore soon! :D

Jon C.

Kor <3

We hardly talk these few days.

But hope our friendship is still as strong as the first time we become siblings .

Always had fun talking to you . All the best for your exams! Dont be overly stress xD

Take Care!

B.H.

Pig. We used to be really close too. But not anymore i guess. Not really sure.

It's difficult to talk to you when i cant hear you at all . Hearing getting worse :/

And all the cold comments make it even harder to say anything. So all i can do is just pretend that i dont want to talk and just say goodbye. :)

You're an awesome friend anyway. Well sort of luh.

Though you're a ~~flirt~~ and everything :p

Take careeee and see you around in school more . LOL.

R.K.

Today was awesome .Your smile is just dashing . Seriously :OI think i've fallen for you over again. But whats the point?It'll be like Prince William and Kate.A prince and a commoner. What are the chances that we'll be together? :(

Anyway, grow taller please :D Kidding.

Thanks for everything and anything , Oh, and finally, you actually know who i am. HAHA. pathetic much. After a year ++ ? :)

THANK YOU GOD ^^

Oh and the last and final guy.The most important and dearest to me.Guess who it is .Handsome, rich, AWESOMEEEEE.HAHA.TO MY DADDDYYYYY!>I love you daddy!You are the best!You do so many things for me and yet you dont complain once.Teach me how you do it! seriously !Stay healthy and safe dad! Love yaaaaa !